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thoughts at day three

We’ve had such a great time reading all the comments that have come through—many from family and friends, but an astonishing number from people we’ve never met. Thank you so much! Even though we’ve been confined more or less in this hospital room, we feel like Valor already has an amazing number of friends.

Occasionally, however, we receive comments from strangers which are less nice than others. Here is one that came in late last night on the thoughts at thirty-five post:

“So government, taxpayer-funded insurance was ok for your family when you needed it for James, but now that you guys don’t need it anymore it’s ‘too costly’ to offer that same care to everyone.

[expletive] typical.”

Yeah, not making this up, unfortunately.

Just to clarify, I believe health care needs reform. I don’t think I know anyone who believes otherwise. From my vantage point, health insurance needs to be divorced from employment, because the connection creates a catch-22 when employees lose their insurance when their healthcare needs result in them losing their job. It also creates an unfair situation for small businesses (including where I work) which cannot negotiate reasonable terms for small group policies. On the flip-side, without group policies, many individuals cannot pass the underwriting hurdle and wind up uninsurable. In summary, I see reducing or eliminating the number of uninsured is a big part of health care reform, along with reining in skyrocketing costs and preserving—if not increasing—the actual quality of care our country enjoys.

Believe me, if I knew all the answers, I’d write about it a lot more.

The House of Gjertsen does not tolerate vulgarity, which is the main reason I didn’t approve the comment. However, I see where the author is coming from, and I’m sensitive to that tension. In a way, it’s right at the heart of what makes health reform so difficult to implement. We want people to use common sense and make good lifestyle choices, as if they were paying for their consequences, but share risk in such a way that avoids the impossible financial burden that advanced care can create. As the commenter correctly observes, there are programs that the state uses to assist parents of medically fragile children, many of them need-based, but all of them publicly-funded. That does seem like the only socially-appropriate solution, and I hope that I, nor any other critic of ObamaCare, have implied that we should do away with such programs. But can we—or should we—apply the same paradigm of fully-subsidized government health care to the relatively healthy majority of the population?

I do know, as a student of economics, that if there is no intersection between the patient and the customer, there are insufficient controls on cost, and the customer almost always makes wasteful choices. In the context of unprecedented levels of federal debt, I don’t see it as economically sustainable that the government be the only “customer” concerning the health of 300 million Americans.

Anyway, here are a couple of anecdotes which I thought sort of magically tied together my earlier post about healthcare with what’s actually happened to us at the hospital.

Anecdote #1:

A half hour before I read that comment, my foot got caught under the rolling leg of a table in our hospital room, and I fell over, hitting the railing of the Murphy bed, my camera, and some other furniture as I fell. (Valor was safe in his bassinet on the other side of the room.) While I bruised various parts of my body in the fall, the most significant was my left foot, which was sprained near some of my toes.

Not a great thing to do, apparently, in a hospital for women & children. After telling the nursing station what happened and asking for a bag of ice, I was informed by two nurses with utmost sincerity that the hospital protocol was to be for me to go to the ORMC emergency room a few blocks away.

Really.

I was relieved when I finally got the ice and understood that their counsel, though serious, was not something they could make me do. I know a thing or two about foot sprains: ice, compression, elevation, possibly tape. And I know that going to wait in an emergency room at midnight instead of going to bed isn’t going to treat me any differently (I’ve been to an ER several years back after a soccer injury left me with a badly sprained ankle), but that it will, with my high-deductible insurance plan, probably cost $2000 out of pocket to have a doctor tell me to use ice, compression, elevation, and possibly tape. The benefit of being the patient and the consumer meant that common sense was brought to bear on the situation. The choice the hospital staff wanted me to make was clear, as was the fact that their policy was constructed with litigation in mind. I wonder if the government were paying all the bills whether I would have gone to the ER (and would I have had a choice? And would I still be there waiting to get service?) Isn’t tort reform an indispensable element of health care reform?

Anecdote #2:

Valor had a tough day yesterday, and did a lot more screaming. Some of it was probably related to his circumcision, and some of it probably related to having gas he couldn’t get out. But around 1:30 am, as I lay on the Murphy bed with ice on my foot, and Abby tried unsuccessfully to get Valor to sleep, we decided for the second night in a row that letting Valor go spend a few hours in the nursery with the professionals (and some people “his own age”) was a better option than trying to be heroes.

We slept pretty well.

Around 4:30, our nurse came in our room and explained to us that he had had a couple episodes of “dusky” color and that he had been put on monitors which meant he wasn’t going to come back in our room until the hospital pediatrician would see him in a couple hours.

When we did hear from the pediatrician, he was concerned because of our family history and wanted to continue to observe Valor today and possibly tonight if necessary. I was somewhat concerned that because of James, they would be more apt to slip into the mentality of over-testing, but after a really good consultation with the pediatrician, he seemed to have a very reasonable balance of caution and common sense. He was hopeful it was no more than an anomaly, and that if not, it wouldn’t require extraordinary measures to diagnose or treat. We thought it was an excellent example of a physician who was authentically putting the patient’s health in the right perspective, and not letting fear of liability drive him to over-test or over-prescribe.

I’ll leave it to the reader to figure out how these things factor into the ways health care needs fixing. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I believe as a country we’re having the right debate over how to improve a system that provides a higher level of care at a lower cost for more people. Our elected leaders would do better if they spent more time listening to their constituents (as opposed to steamrollering their own agenda), and the rest of us would do better to keep our rhetoric constructive. If you want to argue with me, I guarantee you that if you keep it expletive free and respectful, I’m happy to return the favor. That’s how we roll in the House of Gjertsen.

If the thoughts don’t make any sense, I’m a little sleep-deprived.

So, the bottom line as far as our hospital stay is it’s likely we’ll leave later today, but we’re still waiting for an obstetrician to sign off on releasing Abby. So far, Valor is doing great. And both Abby and I can still walk, though we’re not as ambulatory as we will eventually be. Thanks for being patient with the long post, even though I suspect a great many of you just scrolled down to get to:

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28 thoughts on “thoughts at day three”

  1. Oh wow I had anecdote #1 happen to me when I was picking my father up from the hospital after his gall bladder surgery! I have bad knees and I simply tripped over myself and fell in the hospital lobby. I fall all the time, no biggie. But I was scooped up by hospital personnel and wasn’t released until I’d been seen by an orthopedic surgeon (MY own doctor, who was onsite and in surgery) who assured the hospital that I wasn’t any more damaged than I usually am. It took about 4 hours.

    Thankfully my dad hadn’t been discharged, and my own doctor was able to assure the family I was okay to drive.

    Bless little Valor, hopefully he gets more comfortable in his new world quickly.

  2. I know I’m ignoring the bulk of your post here, but I just wanted to say I love the pictures of Valor! He is absolutely adorable! 🙂

  3. Once again: totally, completely, and in all other ways adorable.

    On the health care front: what do you think about the co-op options being floated? Or the Wyden-Bennet idea (which divorces care from employment)? I haven’t done research into details AT ALL, and I know the details are where things happen, but… they sound interesting/good to me.

    I do worry about cost. I also worry about folks who can’t get employer-based insurance and thus are (mostly) shut out of the loop. So I feel that there’s got to be a way (coops or a public option or something else) to create a “group” that’s not employer-based for people to buy into. But, not being an economist, public policy specialist, or anything else relevant, I admit I’m probably missing something.

    Anyway, the main point is — Valor is beautiful. Take care of your foot, and your wife and son. And enjoy them, and ignore the health care debate unless you just want to get involved. 🙂

  4. Congratulations, Valor is beautiful! I remember James from working in the NICU, he was also such a beautiful boy.

    I really admire your way of seeing both sides and maturely allowing healthy debates!

  5. Sharon,

    I’m somewhat embarassed that I’m not familiar with the Wyden-Bennet idea or co-op options. I’ll see what I can find out. I do enjoy discussing policy, and educating myself about it, but I do plan to enjoy Valor and Abby even more 🙂

  6. I am so happy for your family! Valor is beautiful and such a blessing to all of us.

    I totally follow your ideas on health care. We must think alike. And I don’t think Jesus, in the whole WWJD debate, would give away health care. You don’t value something that you don’t work for, nor do you appreciate it fully. He’d want us to work and earn it, I am sure.

  7. I can’t believe that rude reader said that to you! You are entitled to your opinions, as is everyone else.

    I really hope Valor is o.k. and it was just a fluke. And I hope your foot feels better.

    {{{HUGS}}}

  8. I’ve been meaning for a long time to post a comment. I found your blog through cake wrecks on the anniversary of what would have been my son’s birthday. I was amazed at your strength in the midst of your trials when James was born. Your faith and trust in the Lord was shining like a beacon.

    I read through your entire SweetbabyJames blog in one evening. Instead of feeling sorry for myself over my son’s death I began to thank God for the time we had him and for all the healthy children God blessed us with. I’ve bookmarked your blog and have enjoyed seeing you and Abby excitedly anticipating Valor’s arrival. Keep all the beautiful family pictures coming!

    On the insurance issue I hear you. My husband is self-employed and after my 20 year old daughter received an eye injury that required two eye surgeries our insurance jumped to $1,000 dollars a month. We just dropped that policy and our daughter went on a college policy.

  9. Valor and Abby are looking great! I wonder if Valor will have the same beautiful long eyelashes that James did? In parts of Europe healthcare is paid for by an income related tax, and is free when you need it. What value can you put on a life? I cannot see how even ten million dollars is too much to pay to save someone.

  10. This event has been so long-awaited, you must realize we need updates AT LEAST once a day 🙂
    after you’ve caught some sleep of course.

  11. Valor you’re so precious! It will be so wonderful to get to meet you in person soon!

    Anyone out there heard of Medi-Share? or Samaritan Ministries? They are “insurance alternatives”. Several friends use them and love them.

    We recently joined and have been impressed and find they worked well for recent medical expenses. Google their websites for more info if you like.

    Much cheaper per month than any other plan, and total freedom of which doctors to use, plus they have several other nice and enjoyable benefits

  12. What a little Cutie. Can’t wait to see more pictures. Hope everything goes better at home, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve hurt myself in the hospital while Ryland was there. Valor is so lucky to have such Wonderful parents and grandparents.

    About health care I was watching something on tv one day and someone made this comment. “Is it that some people can’t afford health Ins. because they don’t have the money or is it they can’t afford it because they would rather have a new car instead.” With what we pay in Ins. we could have a new car and also live in a nicer house but those things don’t matter to us, not having to worry about how we would take our kids to the doctor to way more importnant.

  13. I too found the sweetbabyjames blog through Cake Wrecks. I read it in its entirety (though admittedly, not in one entire evening- wow!), and I thought it was a beautifully written blog about a difficult yet extremely rewarding experience. I cried and told all my friends about it. I have been following House of Gjertsen ever since, and I was really excited when I read you guys were pregnant again! I’m so glad Valor was born healthy and I am looking forward to reading about him and seeing those adorable and happy pictures! Congratulations, and enjoy your baby son! He is loved!

  14. OMG, Valor keeps getting even more beautiful by the day!

    As baugms says, you must realize we NEED daily updates!!!!

    I’m really happy to hear that you’ll be off probably in the next few hours. I imagine there’s nothing better than going home soon to enjoy Valor more freely (and probably John will not get hurt., I assume he’s already familiar with the furnitures location :P)

    About health care, I do enjoy reading about it. I always like learning about other countries policies and how they handle educacion, health, security, etc. But I can not really have a say about it because it’s totally different in here.
    In Argentina, health care is kind of similar to the one in Europe. If you have a job, you get private health insurance (or the one that the Union provides you with).
    If not, you can go to the public hospital, that is free.
    You can also attend to the public hospital if you have private insurance. Then the hospital charges the private insurance for the services.
    People actually rathers going to public hospitals because the best doctors work there. Medicine and law are the first and second University careers that have the biggest amount of students. (third place is for the one I study, Social Communication)
    Here, doctors really find medicine as a vocation. And it’s very rare that an excellent doctor works in private practise. The problem comes when you need to run special tests with really high tech machines, or MRIs… public hospitals don’t have the equipment to do so.

    If you are employed, the State takes off a 3% of your paycheck for health insurance provided by the Union. But if there’s no Union that rules your working specialty, your job provides you with a private health insurance. If the 3% deduction is not enough to pay for the plan, the employer has the obligation to pay for the rest)

    But there’s a cruel reality too. Here, public hospitals are sustained by citicenz taxes, and the truth is that the taxes are getting higher and higher and hospitals quality are getting lower. To give you an idea, last month (we’re in winter) there was a 400% rise on electricity and gas services. And none of that money is going wether to education or health care.

    So, enough said by me! I hope I didn’t confuse anybody 😛

    I can’t get enough of Valor’s pics! Keep’em coming!
    Hope Abby’s check goes perfect so you can go home and enjoy your cutie.
    It’s such a pleasure being able to share this joy with you.

    Love

    Sabrina from Argentina

  15. Ok, its been 24 hours; where are the new pictures?!?!? Valor is just precious and long anticipated. Your readers need a daily fix. lol

  16. Today I finished reading sweetbabyjames.info after only recently finding the blog. I was in tears until I saw this blog and these posts! Then I had a massive grin, and tears!
    I’ll be praying for Valor

  17. he’s beautiful.

    medical insurance is a strange thing. i live in northern ireland where medical care is free and unlimited to all, so i find the whole system strange.

    god has blessed you with a beautiful child, and you deserve him. if any people deserve this child it’s you. Valor is such a beatiful name, and with such meaning.

    god bless you all.

  18. First I want to say a big congrats to you both and to echo everyone else when I say how beautiful Valor is! I’m another reader that heard of your story through cakewrecks and I was ecstatic to hear that you were pregnant again.

    On the health care side of things, I’m Canadian, so excuse my ‘socialist’ tendencies, but I have to say something in response to Lisa’s comment that

    “And I don’t think Jesus, in the whole WWJD debate, would give away health care. You don’t value something that you don’t work for, nor do you appreciate it fully. He’d want us to work and earn it, I am sure.”….

    Really?!? Where does grace come into play here? Do you take the same approach to your salvation? How a person could say something like that and still profess to love Jesus really boggles my mind… aren’t we called to love those less fortunate than we are?

  19. FYI: I did scroll down to see the pix first. But on reading the post, I agree with your views, and for the most part Lisa’s. To reply to aliciamc’s comment. Loving the less fortunate doesn’t neccessarily mean carrying them along on a handout. What about a hand up that they could pass on to the next person once they are on their feet. There are many problems in our healthcare but we need to get it right, or at least close. The steamroller approach makes me very uncomfortable.

  20. I still fail to see how basic healthcare for everyone, and not just those who can afford it, is anything other than a basic human right. And wouldn’t you rather err on the side of helping someone too much over not helping them enough? It’s funny that the government can spend over $904, 343, 900, 000 in tax payers dollars on war (since 2001), but health care for their own citizens is a big no no.

  21. Funny that many of the patients I have come in contact with have no healthcare insurance, yet they are still receiving care, whether they are citizens of this country or not. I certainly would not say that healthcare for our citizens is a no-no. I will say that when a person has to have medical care or surgery, they don’t have get at the end of a long line of others waiting to be treated months and months in the future. I admit that we need a better plan. That being said, the better plan is not necessarily the one we are being bullied into taking.

  22. BTW: Valor started out so cute and just gets better lookin’ everyday doesn’t he!?! I think that the close up of him with the pacifier reminds me of his big brother. Very sweet… Keep the pictures comin’.

  23. I see the last post on here was a few days ago, so I hope I’m not throwing wood on the fire, but the reason this is such an issue right now is because health care in this country, as practiced right now, is unsustainable.

    Health care was a debate topic back in high school for me back in 1993. People realized back then the day was coming; it’s amazing to me that it’s lasted this long.

    At this point I think several different approaches will work (at least to mitigate some of the cost issues, which is enough to get us along for a while) but I’m worried that the level of fear accompanying the debate will leave us with either no bill or an almost-nothing bill, which won’t do anything. It is untenable to keep the status quo, however, and it is a very real possibility that we might be stagnating the economy for years to come if we can’t restrict the growth of health care costs soon. Otherwise they will be restricted for us – by the lack of resources available for anything else.

  24. I just found your blogs via cakewrecks. I have read through your struggles with tears over things i cannot imagine. I have never felt the need to comment before now because it never seemed my place. Even though i disagree with some of your personal views, I have always understood where you were coming from. On this issue i am simply dumbfounded. I cannot understand how after all you have been through that you cannot manage to understand how other people could find themselves in unavoidable misfortune.

    The fact of the matter is that we live in a society with public hospitals that will not refuse care to those who are uninsured. While this is great for people who cannot afford insurance it also allows people who think they are invincible to leave themselves exposed to inevitable need. These costs are then forwarded to the tax payers. I don’t mind suffering for those who cannot help the need, but I find it hard to stomach footing the bill for ignorant people who refuse to take responsibility for themselves when they can.

    1. Thanks for commenting, Jessie. I think we agree on more than we disagree on. I don’t like like that medical costs have to be higher for the insured in order to subsidize the insured. I’m fully in favor of a system which encourages patients (as opposed to the insurance companies or the government) to be in the driver’s seat when it comes to bearing the cost, either through self-insurance or risk-sharing through insurance. The HSA model is great one. Once patients are connected to the costs, they don’t make extravagant and wasteful decisions. Costs stabilize or go down, and insurance ends up costing less for everyone. Conversely, the more that government intervenes into the process, the less economically efficient the whole thing is. Costs only rise with ObamaCare, and tomorrow the 112th starts down the difficult road of trying to undo the mistakes of the 111th.

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