18 months

You may also like...

6 Responses

  1. Kathy H says:

    The update and photos were simply wonderful! You are such a snazzy looking couple and Valor gets cuter by the day. I miss and love you!

  2. Semele says:

    I notice you say that you spank Valor when he drops food on the floor. What are the spankable offenses for Valor? Does your husband spank you, or vice versa?

    I can see how this might sound judgmental, but that’s not my intent. (Believe me, there’s a big old plank in my eye, so I try my hardest not to judge others.) I’m genuinely curious how you made this choice, and which family members it’s applied to. It’s a hot button topic, so I’ll understand if you don’t want to comment.

    • John says:

      Those are great questions, Semele. I understand it’s a hot button topic, and I appreciate the tone of your question. Our guidance for spanking comes primarily from a book called Shepherding a Child’s Heart. Dropping food on the floor is a spankable offense not so much because it inconveniences us or it’s against household rules, but because it is done defiantly as a challenge to our authority. The key objective in this early stage of development is for Valor to learn that he has a responsibility to obey God as well as his parents (Eph. 6:1-3). That’s a really condensed summary, but hopefully it answers the core of what you were asking. We really enjoyed Ted Tripp’s book and thought it communicated a great deal of wisdom.

      • Sharon Sykes says:

        We just did ‘Shepherding a Child’s Heart’ with my mom’s Bible Study. Dropping food on the floor is our spankable offense too b/c as you said – he knows better and does it out of defiance.

  3. Amy says:

    I also want to comment on the spanking aspect of this post. I have three children, all raise in fear and respect for God… We DO spank… however, we have found as our kids entered preschool age, 2-3, they listened less, and disobeyed more as the spankings became more frequent. we really had to step back, and rethink what is a spankable offense. I consider us to be fairly strict parents, with definate rules and expectations. We find that open communication and explanations of expectations works way better. At 18 months Valor will understand that we don’t toss food on the floor, it makes a mess, and wastes food. He also can understand how to clean it up, and become responsible for his actions… When he dumps his toys all over the floor, does he get spanked, or does he get a chance to learn better choices? I am a firm believer in teaching children to obey, and to fear God… we in our house have found that spanks mean so much more when they are the less used. Just a bit of advice from an old momma! Peace.

    • John says:

      Thanks for the input, Amy! Integral to the spanking routine is explanation and communication. Not sure Valor understands food wasting (I doubt it) but the spanking is for defiance of what he does understand are our rules. Dumping his toys on the floor has never been something we’ve told him not to do; at 34 inches they don’t have too far to fall 😉

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: