Skip to content
Home ยป man of the cloth, chapter the last

man of the cloth, chapter the last

It’s been way too long since I posted about cloth diapering. But tonight as I put what I think might be Valor’s last load into to the washing machine, I figured it’s now or never. So if you don’t want to read about diapers and potty training, you can skip this one (or just look at the pictures)!

A lot of what I said here and here hasn’t changed, but a few things have since I wrote my first two cloth diapering posts. For one thing, I had said that a friend told me I’d only need Fuzzi Bunz Perfect Sizes S and M. Now I know that my kid is bigger than my friend’s kid (Valor hangs out in the 90th percentile), so he has been in FB size L since he was 6 months old. Now he’s stayed in that size for over two years, but full disclosure, I had to get 3 separate stashes of S, M, and L. That increases the financial outlay for cloth (thank you, Grandparents).

Another thing I learned a while back: I tried traveling with cloth, with lots of cute wet bags and so forth, and it was just too much of a pain in my opinion. So I regularly switch him into paper diapers when we go out for a long time or for the weekend or for church, etc.. I could make an exception if I were going to stay at someone’s house for several days that was friendly toward me washing diapers in their machine. But with having to bring the diaper detergent, figure out the amount for their washer, etc., I just find it easier to let it go for a while.

Valor also had problems with recurring impetigo rashes on his bottom from about 1-2 years old, and the medicine for it was suspended in a petroleum jelly so I had to switch him to paper whenever I was treating him for that (so as not to goop up the cloth dipes). The doc said the rash had nothing to do with his using cloth diapers. But treating it was another reason to have paper dipes on hand.

Also, around 12 months old I started double-stuffing the nighttime diapers to absorb the extra nighttime pee. That means I put in 2 inserts instead of 1. I think the Fuzzi Bunz size M and L use the same size inserts, so I just pilfered a few from the M set to add in at night. I have a few “seconds” diapers that ran larger than normal, so I used them at night with the extra stuffing. I never had problems with leaks, but I do not think that Valor is a “heavy wetter.”

I never got a diaper sprayer to squirt off poops into the toilet; I just used toilet paper. Even when using disposables, I roll off the poops (once they are less liquidy) into a toilet, so the trash is less toxic. Valor uses less diapers per day than he used to, so I wash about every 3-4 days instead of every other day now. As far as detergent, I have been happy with Rockin’ Green, one bag of which lasts me a year. I have been a little disappointed with the scents; they never smell much at all to me when I put them in the wash; but I have never needed to “strip” my diapers since I started using RG because the diapers have stayed clean and absorbent. I just got a bag of the new “Soft Rock” to try with the new baby, and I’m curious to see if that formula gets more stains out than the Classic Rock. I don’t use Publix Free & Clear on my dipes anymore because there is no Publix around here, curses! though I still beg my parents to bring me detergent when they visit.

When we moved to coastal NC from Florida, a few things changed about my routine. The water here is soft, but not as soft as our water softener made it in Florida, so I use 2 teaspoons of detergent instead of 1. It’s not as convenient to hang them to dry, and half the year they could hang outside all day and still not get dry because there’s just less sun time than in Florida. So I use the dryer 95% of the time and just ignore the stains that I might be able to bleach out in the sun.

A couple nights ago I watched Valor cavorting in his footie PJs with a giant double-stuffed diaper making his butt look so big and cute, and I realized my little baby is just about all gone. Today completed his first week of potty training, and–thank the Lord–it has gone well! I used the book Potty Wise by Ezzo for a lot of what I did.

We had a false start in February when he saw me buy the potty chair and got really excited about sitting on it. I didn’t think he was ready yet because he never told me he had to go to the bathroom, and never complained when dirty or wet, and disliked having to get his diaper changed when it was dirty or wet (he wanted to keep doing whatever he was doing). This proved to be true; Valor had no idea how to consciously will the pee to come out, and it really tore him up because he wanted to do it so badly. After about a day and a half, we decided to withdraw from the field with honor and try again later. I also decided during that false start that I had to get him training pants, not just cloth underwear, because it stressed me out too much to be worried about him having accidents in the house.

I blocked off the week after Easter to try potty training again because we didn’t have any outings, so we could stay home and stay focused. Valor is just over 2.5 years old now, and although he still hates stopping to get his diaper changed, and still doesn’t indicate awareness that he’s about to let loose with anything, he’s more self-aware of his bodily functions. I think the time since the “false start” might have actually helped awaken him to that.

The book tells you to use a doll dressed in training pants to help teach your toddler the steps of using the potty, but Valor doesn’t play with dolls or even with stuffed animals. He did have a monster that had humanoid-enough feet to wear the pants, though, and he has had great fun helping the monster go potty and watching him “eat” his reward of M&Ms.

I told Valor that the monster, Mommy, Daddy, and all the grandparents were on his “potty training team,” and we got all pumped up about it. Lightning McQueen is also on his team because he’s pictured on the training pants I got. Valor has been really excited; it’s pretty cute. We drink special “potty training juice” and he gets his favorite candy as rewards for staying dry (3 M&Ms), going pee pee in the potty (6 M&Ms, replaces the previous award if earned), and going poopy in the potty (7 M&Ms). We also place calls to team members to report progress and they respond with the appropriate sentiments.

The first day went pretty well, hit and miss, with me taking him to the potty every 30 minutes!, reading books to him, and him squeezing out tiny amounts of pee to enthusiastic praise. Even when he wet his pants, they were training pants so there were no messes to clean up for me, so it wasn’t very stressful. Then day 2 I started trying to stretch the time out and we kind of lost focus. Day 3 was very discouraging; he went back to regularly peeing in his training pants; the only exception was, he stayed dry during his nap (3 hours). That was a surprise. I told John that night that I wasn’t sure whether he was ready and that we might need to stop. He had no success with poop training any of this time.

Day 4 was a turning point. Starting mid morning he had a stretch of 24 hours with dry pants, including his nap, and with very little nighttime pee. He was starting to get more pee out with each try and in larger total volumes, which stretched our schedule out to more like a hour and a half. Pooping was still in the pants, but the peeing part was looking really good. I started thinking about writing my own book about how awesome I was at potty training. ๐Ÿ™‚

Then Day 5…more sad faces than happy on my clipboard notes. And Day 6…the day Daddy takes care of him all morning…he stays dry all day! And today, Day 7, for the first time, with much cajoling and coaxing (7 M&Ms!), I convinced him to sit on the potty and poop for the first time. He was so proud! So far every trip to the bathroom has been Mommy-directed; he never says, “I need to go to the bathroom.” He still resists going if he’s absorbed in a fun activity. But I think he’s made really good progress. So good that I can’t see just using one cloth diaper a day (during the night) and then washing them just a few at a time. So tonight I put the dipes in the wash for what may be the last time. We’ll spend a while longer in training pants until he’s more consistent…and then it’s on to briefs.

My “man of the cloth” is growing up!

15 thoughts on “man of the cloth, chapter the last”

  1. Oooh, a solidly recommended potty training book. We have successfully, without much stress, gotten all 3 of our girls potty trained. My son was 2 in November and I know I’m clueless about how to even go about it. We’ve had a few just-before-the-bath potty breaks that went well, but those were outnumbered by him fighting because he didn’t ‘have any.’ Each of those matched equally to the number of times he went in the bathtub, so, you know, it’s been fun. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I’m going to have to check out Potty Wise. Seriously, no rewards or anything necessary for the girls; this will be a whole new ballgame.

    Thanks for the update.

  2. Oh – and I just adore your family. Valor has grown up so well. He’s so handsome, and seems very smart…and I know so much of that is due to the love and attention he receives. Kudos to Abby and John and your own extended family/village.

    1. Thanks Amye! Getting your son excited and maintaining that excitement level is key. Now that the novelty of the potty has worn off, it’s a battle to get Valor to go to the potty (and stop what he’s doing). The M&Ms reward and calls to Grandmas have been very helpful to keep him in the game.

  3. I’m glad you’ve posted about cloth diapers, I was alittle scared at first but when Vera was 4 months old we started using cloth and couple months in I thought what is so hard about this. We started the Potty traning with Vera when she was 18months old she did good at first but stopped so we stopped and started back up when she was 23 months and now at 26 months she is (for the most part) potty trained. It was alittle sad to wash the cloth diapers for the last time but like use said it just isn’t worth your time if your only using 1 diaper a day. I’ve gotten lucky and Vera stays dry most night wearing just underwear, she loves picking out new underwear. I friend of mine has a business that sales cloth diapers and maternity clothing, it’s Elegant Mommy, and she also has a online shop and on Fri on her Facebook page they have a comment game.
    HoPE everything else is going good with you guys. I still can’t believe that Valor is so big and smart, Vera hates to sit still to do anything, been trying to do colors and shapes with her but she don’t even like to color.

    1. Go girl. I can’t believe Vera is 26 months already! I bet she surprises you every day with something new.
      I have heard a lot of moms (as well as Ezzo) say that the key to successful potty training is that they are “ready.” If they are not ready, it’s just going to be mutually frustrating.

  4. Hey, Abby,
    Been thinking about you a lot this week.
    We potty trained Caleb in Florida, and it was pretty much like your description. At the end, we had a “potty party.” He got to invite a friend and choose the meal. It was the George Baugartner and wieners. Very appropriate.
    It was that night that Carrie had Simon.

    1. Ah yes, we will never forget finding “Everybody Poops” at your house in Fla. Alas until now we had no empathy for you/him. In that last picture Valor looks a lot like I remember Caleb looking at that time.

  5. Both my boys were not successful with potty training until after they turned 3. Before that we had several tries that did not end so well. ( frustrated mommy and boys who did not like the potty.)
    One thing that helped keep them excited about the potty was a sticker chart. They got a sticker everytime they went poty. They both loved getting stickers! We also used M&M’s too.

  6. Very cute account of the whole process. When my children were little, cloth was all we had, so I never thought about whether it was easy or not..it was just what you did. I have generally found girls easier to train than boys, but Anthony trained much more quickly than twin sister Kayla, mostly because he was much more bothered by wet/dirty diapers than she was. Valor seems to be training pretty easily.Just in time for the next one!

  7. There is a book called “How to Potty Train Your Monster” very cute and a fun read for both of you! My kids never told me if they had to go, they would just go by themselves, still do unless we are in a store. We are preparing to potty train our 23 month old, she shows readiness and loves to use it at night before her bath. So its time! I appreciate the advice on cloth diapering because we are going to give it a try with this coming baby (YIKES!!) I am a little terrified, BUT I think I can I think I can….

  8. I was just wondering about how your cloth diapering was going/wrapping up the other day, so I was excited to see your post! Yay for Valor! Cora (3yrs+2mos) has had a few false starts, but has spent all her waking hours since Friday in underwear, so I am feeling hopeful. Since my just-turned-1-year-old will be in diapers for quite a while longer, an *occasional* wet/dirty Cora diaper isn’t an issue, but I am hoping that we can get to the point soon where I can return to just washing diapers every 2 days. We’ve been stuck at every day since Aliza was born, and with a front loader it feels like our washer is in use every waking moment. I used Rockin’ Green for a couple of years after you posted about it (thanks!), but have switched to Charlie’s Soap for our current tub, and I think I might like it better. It’s hard to tell — with a front loader, I get ammonia-stink problems at the drop of a hat. I can get it at my local grocery store now, though, so no S&H. I started out like you with Cora & disposables but have found, with Aliza, that I prefer to just bring cloth diapers along for trips, with a few disposables in the bottom of the bag for emergencies. I think at some point I got to a threshold where it was more of a hassle to keep track of how many disposables we had left than to just load the diaper bag with cloth dipes — so you may find with your newbie that your preferences change. Or not. ๐Ÿ™‚ And yes, Sam, you can! It isn’t too hard — just new routines.

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: